There’s a powerful, direct link between how you feel and what you focus on.

The sun or the rain?

My 6 year old son and I were having breakfast yesterday, when he noticed something. If he looked out of the window on one side of the room, the sun was shining, however, if he looked out of the window on the opposite side of the room, the sky was dark and it was starting to rain. He was fascinated by this for a while, before deciding he’d look out of the sunny window. I asked him why he picked the sunny window and he told me, it makes him happy to see the sunshine.

• If you want to feel sunny, it makes sense to focus on the sunshine.
• If you want to feel down, it makes sense to focus on the dark grey skies.

What makes no sense at all, is wanting to feel good whilst focusing on the things that make you feel down.

Controlling your focus and the way that you feel

I’m not suggesting for one moment that when things are bad, you just ignore them and focus on something else. That’s delusional. It’s self defeating. What I am suggesting, is that you focus on the appropriate things, to enable you to best deal with whatever situations you find yourself in.

For example:

• When you want to feel confident, focus on past victories.
• When you want to feel loved, focus on those who love you and have loved you.
• When you want to feel happy, focus on the things that make you feel good inside.

Further Reading: There’s more information about the link between what you focus on and how you feel, in this article.

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Photo: John Morgan